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i reali reali like the lyrics of this song. it's all i wanna say to you ken. in the end, you win, i lose. simple as that. what's there more to say? nothing much to complain, nothing much i can do about it. all i can do is wait, out of my own accord. somehow, that feels.. right.
wondered where you were again on sunday. out with another girl? slacking? sleeping? out with friends? but i felt relief, once again. a mixure of feelings wrestled themselves within me. i dunno how to go on, but i'm just pushing myself, trying to escape, trying to tell myself over and over again that it's over. but it all seems so... surreal. thoughts of you are constantly plaguing my mind. i wish so much, time and again, i could turn back time. but then again, if i could, would i have reali changed anything? could i actually change anything?
one just feels a sense of loss. i've promised myself that i'm gonna start thinking of bigger things and the pressing needs of others, instead of all my minor love problems. actually, it's not a problem anymore, and the problem doesn't exist. i'm just creating one. (this sounds reali familiar. sigh.) in times like this, i duno what to do. i just.. just miss you, that's all. is that wrong? in the end, try as i might, i cannot erase thoughts of you. avoiding, i'm tryin. forgetting, it's hard. how do i start thinking of other things? try harder, i guess.
in evry post that concerns matters of the heart, not one is logical. not one at all.
it's painful, this entire process. but i'll be fine. i duno how long i can keep this up. but i'll be fine.
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thank you to the ppl who agreed to watch mama mia with me (ie, josel, wen, min, charis, jon snr, tsu ern, j, mindy & steph <-- in order of seating arrangement). i had a blast. (: josel's car ride was fun, the company was great, and the movie was superb.
i realised, movies can be watched with other ppl too. it's hard when the person beside me is not you, but i'll make this work. somehow. i'll get used to it.